fuck huntingtons disease

All i do from time i wake until i go to bed all i do is lay down in bed not doing anything. I don't have room in caravan to do my crafts and always have put them away when kids come home. I lost alot of my craft things in flood. So with the crap i dont bother outside is too hot or dusty. Caravan is hot 9months of year. Freezing the rest. Being bush is horrible without a house or level ground protection for weather. Nothing to do being stuck here 3 years and no hope of leaving this place. Caravan needs thousands of dollars to fix A frame and a few other thing's   before we tow it again. Never-ending loop no money fix caravan no money to move back near family and doctors no money for bond or loan for a new home. Now i broken bone in foot i can't shower or toilet tim has to do sponge bath. All i do it cry i can't keep living this hell but no way out.

no hope

I'm really depressed today no hope no money i have huntingtons disease which is brain disease i have 10 yrs left and need to move back a get a home need the rest of our families but we are to far indebt the bank won't touch us. I need a disability home for our family no rentals to expensive no home where need to go. We live in a caravan out in the bush. No hope for better future. No matter what i try to fix our lives. Im nothing but a failure

Today is the 9th death anniversary for my mum whow had huntingtons disease. She died age 52yrs. Same horrible disease i have..but i forgot about until. 4pm today because I've been busy setting up and organising market stall too sell my jewellery product i been so focused on selling and trying to make ake money for a home. I forget it and now feel so guilty for not doing anything in her memory. I have normal traditions we do every year but not today..we live in a unfinished caravan and in the bush with bush shower. I can't live this any more keep bumping myself hurts or the falls or the hike for bush shower. We are 10hrs away from family and huntingtons disease doctors so we need to raise money to move back. I need a disability home so i want to built one for my needs or find a rental and in the market it hard to find rentals. I need lots of disability support. I tried fund raising but no one donated..so i my home made jewellery no one brought..so i thought i would buy products sell them to.make money didn't sell any on Facebook...tired to do shopify couldn't set it up and google....so organised first markets yesterday 1sale today 1 sale....i feel like a failure over and over and over again fail to be a good mum fail to provide for my kids ...my kids could have this horrible disease too... i failed mum not being there and no i failed her memory.. why because no matter how much i try i never get anywhere..im story for the long post but i thought i would post to u wonderful people...